Bottom of the cruise barrel

My office went on a cruise, and we chose this trip based on dates of availability. There were some things I enjoyed - we had a good time playing trivia, the food was good, and most of the staff were very nice. Here are my issues:

- It took FOREVER to get a drink at any bar on the ship. Bartenders were extremely slow and I was served one of the worst drinks I had ever had.

- The entire fifth deck, where the casino was located, reeked of cigarette smoke. Their air filtration system was terrible.

- The cruise director Donkey was very annoying (and I know that cruise directors as a group are annoying, but he was excessively annoying.)

- The ship had apparently been recently refurbished but looked like 1975 Vegas. It is by far the ugliest cruise ship I have ever been on. Our room was various shades of orange with hideous lamps that looked like pencils and brown curtains. The bathroom was an ugly green. The art hanging in the hallways featured things like dancing polar bears.

- I had a facial and was unimpressed.

- We were THREE HOURS late getting off the ship. Allegedly this is because four people were arrested by CBP upon our arrival. Charming.

- Finally, this is my last Carnival cruise mostly because of my fellow passengers. Carnival is among the cheapest, especially out of Galveston, and it showed. There were lots of rowdy passengers who were loud, rude and generally trashy. I'm glad I didn't bring family or kids.