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The Miracle is reminiscent of an aging dowager sporting an excess of poorly applied makeup who defiantly refuses to update either her appearance or the cuisine she serves to guests. Before booking this cruise, my husband and I re-set (i.e. lowered) our expectations based upon past reviews and You Tube video tours. Nevertheless, we forged ahead and enjoyed some aspects while being terribly disappointed in others. Embarkation: Abysmal. It took 2 hours to board in Long Beach while waiting one hour in cold wet weather to check in, and the next inside a huge freezing building waiting to enter the ship. Stateroom: Our extended balcony stateroom was a pleasant surprise. It was amazingly clean (and I check everything!) and spacious. The bed was the most comfortable I've ever slept on at sea, and Ni Wayan, our stateroom attendant, was top-notch. The balcony was large and contained two chairs and a small metal table. If you can get past chipped furniture and a dated orange and red décor, which was no problem for us, you'll be very happy overall with an extended balcony stateroom! The Ship Itself: Anyone who has viewed the vessel's interior will have been prepared for its "Michaelangelo on Steroids Let Loose in the Funhouse" appearance. Be ready to encounter renditions of voluptuous damsels cheek to jowl with Frankenstein statues, and oversized puce-colored grapes hanging from the dining room ceiling. That said, Gatsby's Garden and the Library (which was surprisingly well-stocked) were pleasant surprises. Gatsby's Garden is a relaxation area that few passengers are aware of, where one can curl up by a large porthole and daydream. The public areas were absolutely frigid, to the point where we shunned several activities because we couldn't tolerate the cold. When we spoke to the lovely Guest Services staff about it, there was nothing they said they could do. The Food: A huge disappointment despite our meager expectations. The cuisine in the MDR and the buffet were nearly identical each night, so if you didn't like the choices in the MDR there really were no other options. The cheapest cuts of meat were used, and the bread was akin to Wonder bread with nary a nod to anything invented in the last 30 years such as multigrain. Overall, the dining experience was reminiscent of 1950's style cuisine with everything overly-salted, smothered in cream sauce, and cooked way so long that the food lost its original flavor. In the buffet, salads consisted of iceberg lettuce, carrot coins, and melon, with nearly everything else smothered in mayonnaise. Even the made-to-order pizzas were disappointing as they had no taste whatsoever - which is nearly unimaginable for pizza. In a nutshell, if you're a healthy eater who thrives on flavorful fresh food, you'll have slim pickings on this ship. Generally it took an average of 1 1/2 to 2 hours to eat dinner in the MDR, and the wait staff were hit-or-miss with some (like Kadek) excellent and others inefficient. That said, the highlight of dinner was "Showtime" when the lights would dim, the music started, and the wait staff danced (sometimes with the passengers) leaving everyone smiling despite their tepid dinners. Entertainment: Since it was too cold to sit for long in many of the venues, we skipped most of the shows. Activities: A pleasant surprise was the availability of science and art lectures, which we've only seen offered on more upscale vessels. And we were also pleased that there were no major attempts to constantly sell things to passengers. Overall, this made for a pleasant and low-key experience. The Fitness Center was beautiful and all the equipment appeared clean and in good working order. There's also a steam room, sauna, and indoor whirlpool nearby. Crew: The best we've encountered. Everyone was pleasant, helpful, and cheerful, and above all genuine. Debarkation: Much quicker than embarkation, except that the single "down" escalator was broken and only one elevator was available, so most passengers who could do so elected to drag their luggage down long flights of stairs in lieu of waiting on a long line for the elevator.

Faded Glory

Carnival Miracle Cruise Review by Bestbird

12 people found this helpful
Trip Details
  • Sail Date: January 2016
  • Destination: Mexican Riviera
  • Cabin Type: Extended Balcony
The Miracle is reminiscent of an aging dowager sporting an excess of poorly applied makeup who defiantly refuses to update either her appearance or the cuisine she serves to guests.

Before booking this cruise, my husband and I re-set (i.e. lowered) our expectations based upon past reviews and You Tube video tours. Nevertheless, we forged ahead and enjoyed some aspects while being terribly disappointed in others.

Embarkation:

Abysmal. It took 2 hours to board in Long Beach while waiting one hour in cold wet weather to check in, and the next inside a huge freezing building waiting to enter the ship.

Stateroom:

Our extended balcony stateroom was a pleasant surprise. It was amazingly clean (and I check everything!) and spacious. The bed was the most comfortable I've ever slept on at sea, and Ni Wayan, our stateroom attendant, was top-notch. The balcony was large and contained two chairs and a small metal table. If you can get past chipped furniture and a dated orange and red décor, which was no problem for us, you'll be very happy overall with an extended balcony stateroom!

The Ship Itself:

Anyone who has viewed the vessel's interior will have been prepared for its "Michaelangelo on Steroids Let Loose in the Funhouse" appearance. Be ready to encounter renditions of voluptuous damsels cheek to jowl with Frankenstein statues, and oversized puce-colored grapes hanging from the dining room ceiling.

That said, Gatsby's Garden and the Library (which was surprisingly well-stocked) were pleasant surprises. Gatsby's Garden is a relaxation area that few passengers are aware of, where one can curl up by a large porthole and daydream.

The public areas were absolutely frigid, to the point where we shunned several activities because we couldn't tolerate the cold. When we spoke to the lovely Guest Services staff about it, there was nothing they said they could do.

The Food:

A huge disappointment despite our meager expectations. The cuisine in the MDR and the buffet were nearly identical each night, so if you didn't like the choices in the MDR there really were no other options. The cheapest cuts of meat were used, and the bread was akin to Wonder bread with nary a nod to anything invented in the last 30 years such as multigrain. Overall, the dining experience was reminiscent of 1950's style cuisine with everything overly-salted, smothered in cream sauce, and cooked way so long that the food lost its original flavor. In the buffet, salads consisted of iceberg lettuce, carrot coins, and melon, with nearly everything else smothered in mayonnaise. Even the made-to-order pizzas were disappointing as they had no taste whatsoever - which is nearly unimaginable for pizza. In a nutshell, if you're a healthy eater who thrives on flavorful fresh food, you'll have slim pickings on this ship.

Generally it took an average of 1 1/2 to 2 hours to eat dinner in the MDR, and the wait staff were hit-or-miss with some (like Kadek) excellent and others inefficient. That said, the highlight of dinner was "Showtime" when the lights would dim, the music started, and the wait staff danced (sometimes with the passengers) leaving everyone smiling despite their tepid dinners.

Entertainment:

Since it was too cold to sit for long in many of the venues, we skipped most of the shows.

Activities:

A pleasant surprise was the availability of science and art lectures, which we've only seen offered on more upscale vessels. And we were also pleased that there were no major attempts to constantly sell things to passengers. Overall, this made for a pleasant and low-key experience.

The Fitness Center was beautiful and all the equipment appeared clean and in good working order. There's also a steam room, sauna, and indoor whirlpool nearby.

Crew:

The best we've encountered. Everyone was pleasant, helpful, and cheerful, and above all genuine.

Debarkation:

Much quicker than embarkation, except that the single "down" escalator was broken and only one elevator was available, so most passengers who could do so elected to drag their luggage down long flights of stairs in lieu of waiting on a long line for the elevator.
Bestbird’s Full Rating Summary
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