Scenic Jade Review
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Pre-Cruise: We were among the group of Scenic passengers impacted by the ransomware attack on Scenic’s website in February 2022. Based on positive reviews on CruiseCritic, we took the leap of faith and made our final payment in March. The hack put the Scenic website offline for about 6 weeks, and holds to reach an agent by phone took hours. We ended up calling Scenic two weeks before departure and an agent emailed us our boarding documents—we received hard copies about 7 days prior to the start of our trip. Due to an error by our travel agent (who had left the agency) the request for promised OBC did not get made in time—Scenic requires the request 21 days prior to the start of any travel. Lots of blow-by-blow on difficulty reaching Scenic in the River Cruising thread “What is going on with Scenic Cruises” started on 23 February 2022, so I will not dwell on this. Bottom line: Information provided by Scenic on ports and the excursions offered in them on its website is very limited. Combined with the issues after the hack, it made pre-cruise planning very difficult and stressful.
We had a land package booked through Scenic so had already spent a week touring with them for the Passion Play in Oberammergau plus stops in Vienna, Salzburg, Munich, and Zurich. Of the five hotels used, two (Goldener Hirsch in Salzburg and Schweizerhof in Zurich) were five-star level, two were mid-range (Hilton Park in Vienna and L’Meridien in Munich), and one was 3-star at best (Parkhotel am Solersee). The bus used by Scenic had Wi-Fi that worked well overall and a conscientious team of bus driver and tour director. A few issues as this was the first time the TD did this itinerary, but worked out. The promised transfer also did not meet us at the airport in Vienna, but the TD did reimburse us in cash for our taxi fare.
Boarding and Briefings: Two days prior to our scheduled boarding in Basel, the TD told us we would not be boarding the Scenic Jade—most likely it would be the Scenic Amber. A check of cruise mapping sites, however, showed that to be unlikely given the position of the Amber. The day prior, he told us we would not be going to Basel, Switzerland to board but would be bused an additional hour to the German city of Breisach due to a strike in Strasbourg. The latter also turned out to be not true--it was a threat of a labor stoppage by the lock staff near Basel, not anything to do with Strasbourg. (So, don’t take lack of communication or miscommunication from Scenic personally—they seem to do the same with their own personnel (independent contractors, in the case of the TDs). And two days after we boarded the Jade, we received an email from Scenic notifying us of the change in boarding location—a little late.) We did end up boarding the Scenic Jade. It was pouring rain and the ship had not set up tents for passengers waiting to go up the boarding bridge and then down the open stairway to the ship nor did they offer umbrellas. It was slippery and felt a little unsafe, not to mention getting very wet. (By comparison, when we returned in the rain to the Crystal Ravel from an excursion during our sailing in October 2021, ship personnel created an umbrella brigade to keep us dry.) Greeted by the CD and crew and directed to the lounge. Staff was then to invite you by party to go to Reception to check-in, but there was a scrum at the desk of previous cruisers trying to check in before others. In the lounge we had a glass of German sparkling wine and a short talk by the CD then proceeded to Reception for check-in. That consisted of turning in our medical forms, having our photo taken, and receiving our cruise IDs. Our butler escorted us from Reception to our cabin, where the luggage was waiting. The CD held a welcome briefing at 1815 hours in the lounge, including introductions and remarks by the captain, hotel director, chef, and restaurant/sommelier. On our sailing, the safety briefing was held on the first morning of the cruise while we were sailing. Stay in your cabin and then go up to the sun deck (bring a hat and sunglasses if the day is sunny). After that, the CD did a presentation on the cruise itinerary back in the lounge, handed out sign-up sheets for excursions, and the Assistant CD (called the Enrichment Manager by Scenic) briefed on the use of the ship’s e-bikes. Prior to dinner that second night on board, we had the Captain’s Welcome with a glass of German sparkling wine and a couple of hors d’oeuvres passed by the wait staff. The captain introduced his deputy captains (except the one manning the wheelhouse, of course!) and heads of housekeeping and security as well as the purser, wellness consultant, the hotel manager, restaurant manager/sommelier, and head chef.
Cabin Review
We booked a Balcony Junior Suite, which offered a little extra space but also an invitation to the Table la Rive wine-pairing dinner on this 7-night cruise. The cabin is nicely designed from an aesthetics point of view but lacked in functionality. To conserve floor space, the closet doors slide over each other so only half of the closet is available at any time. There is only about 6 inches of hanging space for long clothes as the back of the closet is pushed out on one side so the coat hangers will not fit in. That side of the closet has a small and a medium drawer on the bottom (substituting for the drawers on the nightstand on the right of the bed, which is just a table). The minibar is also here with a shelf above for glasses. The other (left) side of the closet has about a foot of short hanging space plus shelves. One of the shelves had two electrical outlets (European two-pin) so you could use it for a charging center, if desired.
The desk/vanity area also has outlets (all Euro) and three lit shallow shelves above. It has no drawer. It has a small, stubby chair and an oddly placed small table. An ice bucket on a stand completes the furniture. The bed is an oversized queen with a duvet and is quite comfortable. There is a pillow menu available on the TV. And the “balcony” with two wicker chairs and a small, round table. Since we only rafted a couple of times during the sailing, we got some good use of our balcony.
Our room had a bathtub and a shower. There is a clothesline in the small shower cabinet. It would be better placed over the tub for drying—a lack of air circulation in the shower cabinet meant it took days for things that normally dry overnight. Consider bringing one of the multi-arm drying racks to hang in the shower. (We never used the tub—when Scenic refurbishes this ship or brings new ones into service it should consider taking out the tub and making a nice, large shower. They should also consider adding a self-serve laundry—perhaps in place of the salt therapy room, which I never saw used.) There are only two towel bars by the end of the tub/vanity, so you can either hang the bath towels so they can dry or double them up to leave space for the hand towels. There are two hooks on the door, but if you hang the robes there it covers up the only full-length mirror in the room. There is great storage space behind the mirrors and under the vanity. Scenic no longer uses L’Occitane products as cited in their website. Now there are bottles of ESPA hand wash and lotion attached to the wall by the sinks and body wash, shampoo, and conditioner attached to the wall in the shower.
The TV has a lot of functions and offers information on the journey and ship as well as TV and movies. It glows, however, even after you use the remote to turn it off (a two-step process). There is a switch on back, lower right that turns it off fully.