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The Carnival Breeze is basically the floating version of Guy Fieri: Loud, obnoxious, garish, overstuffed and cheap. After a decade in use, the Breeze needs to be dry docked and spruced up -- it's showing its age. The smoking areas are WAY too big and poorly positioned. The casino is right in the middle of the ship and is basically a poison cloud. Lots of lunch options on the Breeze. The Guy Fieri burger bar is actually decent, but I refuse to visit Flavortown on principle. Blue Iguana is OK, not great, and the same goes for Pizza Pirate. The Guy Fieri Pig and Anchor BBQ is utter trash, but then again, what fool thinks you can smoke meat effectively in the middle of the ocean? Mongolian BBQ and pasta bar are generally the two best bets for lunch. Food in the main dining room has been declining for years and is now largely terrible -- underseasoned, steam table junk that often arrives at room temp. Servers are still great but seem much more overworked. Your only other dinner options are the steak house (pretty good, but difficult to book a table); the Lido Buffett (lousy and crowded with kids and people who don't know how to behave in public); the Seafood Shack (you pay full price, essentially, for mediocre crab legs and bad lobster rolls) and the Italian restaurant, which is hit or miss. One of Carnival's biggest problems, I hate to say, is its clientele. At this price point, you're getting a LOT of drunks and people with atrocious/non-existent manners. I'm talking about yelling at service staff over trivial things, cutting in line, coughing without covering mouths etc. I know, you're probably dismissing me as some kind of snob -- but this was my 6th Carnival cruise, so my proletariat credentials are rock solid. I'm not saying Carnival should target the Vichyssoise and formal dance program set, but it would be nice if 25-percent of the ships guests weren't riding mobility scooters and stuffing next month's disability check into the slot machine. Entertainment was brutal. I did appreciate the fact that the woman who emceed "Friends Trivia" was so obvious in her contempt for us. Her sarcasm and dripping disdain for the ship's guests was an interesting contrast to the humble, ingratiating service offered by everyone else. It PROBABLY has something to do with the fact that she's American and doesn't rely on passenger gratuities for support her entire family. Cabin was clean and our steward was great. Service, in general, is usually very good on Carnival ships. It's unfortunate that so many cheap people assume that because the gratuities are built it, it absolves them from and further tipping. If you can't afford to give your main dining room servers or cabin steward a bonus at the end of the cruise -- bare minimum -- then you can't afford to cruise. Carnival does need to adjust its gratuity system, however, It makes zero sense to have a tip line for the cashier at the candy store (who does nothing except ring you out) and no tip line for the staff at the jewelry store (who spend a lot of time advising guests on purchases). I'd suggest tipping in cash rather than adding it to your receipt, as there is no guarantee that the tip actually goes to the person serving you. Port Canaveral has embarkation down to a science, but debarkation is only smooth if you're at the bottom of the boat. If you're at the top, you might have to wait hours until your floor is called. Would I sail the Breeze again? I can't rule it out entirely. If I suffer some kind of temporary amnesia -- or if Guy Fieri agrees to be my personal room steward and cabin butler -- I might agree.

The Real, Unvarnished Truth About the Carnival Breeze

Carnival Breeze Cruise Review by penguinusa

8 people found this helpful
Trip Details
The Carnival Breeze is basically the floating version of Guy Fieri: Loud, obnoxious, garish, overstuffed and cheap.

After a decade in use, the Breeze needs to be dry docked and spruced up -- it's showing its age. The smoking areas are WAY too big and poorly positioned. The casino is right in the middle of the ship and is basically a poison cloud.

Lots of lunch options on the Breeze. The Guy Fieri burger bar is actually decent, but I refuse to visit Flavortown on principle. Blue Iguana is OK, not great, and the same goes for Pizza Pirate. The Guy Fieri Pig and Anchor BBQ is utter trash, but then again, what fool thinks you can smoke meat effectively in the middle of the ocean? Mongolian BBQ and pasta bar are generally the two best bets for lunch.

Food in the main dining room has been declining for years and is now largely terrible -- underseasoned, steam table junk that often arrives at room temp. Servers are still great but seem much more overworked.

Your only other dinner options are the steak house (pretty good, but difficult to book a table); the Lido Buffett (lousy and crowded with kids and people who don't know how to behave in public); the Seafood Shack (you pay full price, essentially, for mediocre crab legs and bad lobster rolls) and the Italian restaurant, which is hit or miss.

One of Carnival's biggest problems, I hate to say, is its clientele. At this price point, you're getting a LOT of drunks and people with atrocious/non-existent manners. I'm talking about yelling at service staff over trivial things, cutting in line, coughing without covering mouths etc.

I know, you're probably dismissing me as some kind of snob -- but this was my 6th Carnival cruise, so my proletariat credentials are rock solid. I'm not saying Carnival should target the Vichyssoise and formal dance program set, but it would be nice if 25-percent of the ships guests weren't riding mobility scooters and stuffing next month's disability check into the slot machine.

Entertainment was brutal. I did appreciate the fact that the woman who emceed "Friends Trivia" was so obvious in her contempt for us. Her sarcasm and dripping disdain for the ship's guests was an interesting contrast to the humble, ingratiating service offered by everyone else. It PROBABLY has something to do with the fact that she's American and doesn't rely on passenger gratuities for support her entire family.

Cabin was clean and our steward was great. Service, in general, is usually very good on Carnival ships. It's unfortunate that so many cheap people assume that because the gratuities are built it, it absolves them from and further tipping. If you can't afford to give your main dining room servers or cabin steward a bonus at the end of the cruise -- bare minimum -- then you can't afford to cruise.

Carnival does need to adjust its gratuity system, however, It makes zero sense to have a tip line for the cashier at the candy store (who does nothing except ring you out) and no tip line for the staff at the jewelry store (who spend a lot of time advising guests on purchases). I'd suggest tipping in cash rather than adding it to your receipt, as there is no guarantee that the tip actually goes to the person serving you.

Port Canaveral has embarkation down to a science, but debarkation is only smooth if you're at the bottom of the boat. If you're at the top, you might have to wait hours until your floor is called.

Would I sail the Breeze again? I can't rule it out entirely. If I suffer some kind of temporary amnesia -- or if Guy Fieri agrees to be my personal room steward and cabin butler -- I might agree.
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