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Britannia Cruise Review
5.0 / 5.0
Cruise Critic Editor Rating
961 Reviews

First Time Cruising

Britannia Cruise Review by Kalasi

3 people found this helpful
Trip Details
  • Sail Date: Jul 2018
  • Destination: Europe

I chose this cruise as the cabins are stylish, it is British in personality, and passengers are allowed to take their own alcohol onboard (1L each, although I did take a bit more onboard with no problems).

My balcony cabin with sofa was not only nice to look at, but so well designed that it felt much larger. The bed was extremely comfortable, the TV had a lot of films to watch, the White Company products were excellent quality, and the towels were large and fluffy.

The cabin was seen to by the steward twice a day, even though his cleaning and tidying skills were not always on par.

There is a free laundry and iron as well, which is a helpful touch.

The buffet for breakfast is fine in quality and has more than enough variety.

The buffet for lunch and dinner is, however, awful. The food is worse than at a service station and how they "get away" with serving such slop is a mystery.

I had freedom dining given for free (as I think everyone does, so don't pay extra for it) so ate when I liked in the restaurants the rest of the time. The food was sometimes very tasty, other times just okay. Imagine going to a restaurant in the 1970s and you'll have the right idea...prawn cocktail and well-done roast beef, anyone?!?

The drinks onboard are the same as in a decent pub.

The entertainment is not awful, but it's not very good either. I saw "Astonishing" and "The Sound of the Underground", which while billed a magic show/musical, are really a selection of dance routines and songs. The best thing about the shows is how attractive some of the dancers are (!) which says a lot about their dancing and singing talent.

I saw Zoë Tyler as well, who was excellent on account of being a real performer and not just a hotty who can hold a note and twist a bit.

The "Sail Away" things were as embarrassing as they were tacky, although it was interesting to experience what Butlins must be like. Also embarrassing/ irritating was when they paraded the chefs and waiters around to the bellows of Tina Turner while we were eating.

The gala evenings were a non-event. I was stressed that my dinner jacket was too big for me and that I had to wear a dark suit, but I need not have worried as there were as many people in full black tie, as the were in just a suit. The reality is that it is not nearly as special as P&O make out: you dress up, you have a free drink (or three) listen to the captin's speech, the (also very good looking) photographers try to get you to have your photo taken, and then you go for dinner as normal. That's it! Nothing magical happens.

The service was odd. The woman were all very friendly but a lot of the men had a chip in their shoulder and were very cold with me. One waiter, strangly, started off being very chummy and chatty, and then when I started eating my food (thus, signaling our chat was over) he became very rude by banging things on the table and ignoring my requests...it was like that for the rest of the cruise!

I got on and off the boat very quickly and had no problems with the lifts.

I did not take any P&O shore tours as they are a rip-off.

Will I cruise agian? Yes! Will I cruise on Britannia again? Yes!

Kalasi's Full Rating Summary
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Cabin Review

Cabin Balcony with Sofa 615

It's good because it is not above or below any venues. It is not so good because it is very close to the tops of the lifeboats which spoils the view a little.

Port & Shore Excursion Reviews

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