My resume: This was my 12th cruise (6 on RCCL, 2 on NCL, 2 on Princess, 1 on Carnival). It will be my first and last on Holland America.

I booked this cruise because the itinerary sounded fabulous and unique. I read all the ship and port reviews I could find before booking; I thought I was an informed traveler and had done my due diligence. I did extensive research to plan all my port stops and excursions ahead of time.

No one told me that the average HAL cruiser is age 85. Which made me 45 years younger than virtually everyone else on board. It felt like a floating senior citizen's center. I knew it was bad when, on day 3, a 70+ year old man sat down beside me and complained that there were "too many old people" on board. And it wasn't just a fluke -- this was clearly HAL's target demographic. From the Sinatra/Bennett/Mathis muzak to the "remember Broadway in the 1940's" show and the Neil Diamond tribute artist, to the drinks menu at the bars (who orders a Tom Collins anymore?!), the whole cruise screamed "retirement village." Read more