My husband and I rather impetuously decided to sail on Holland America’s Statendam 45 day combined Hawaii, French Polynesian and Panama Canal cruise departing from San Diego on Dec. 16, 2013. He has cruised many times, including voyages taken with HAL several decades ago. The sum of our combined recent cruise experience (over the past ten years) was a total of 20 days of "free-styling" around the Caribbean; and so we had no recent experience with HAL or any basis of comparison for this class of ship. Since this was going to be a “once in a lifetime experience,” we decided to go for broke (literally) and booked a Neptune Suite on the 10th deck. This afforded us access to the Neptune Lounge and other amenities. What was really appealing was the fact that the Neptune Lounge was advertised as a WIFI hotspot. (More on this important “convenience” later.) Other than that, we had no knowledge of the current HAL and, therefore we were not aware of the Mariner Program which awards passengers Dam Stars for each cruise and for the amount of dollars spent on board. Despite our status as a “Suite Guest”, we quickly realized that we were in the unenviable category of “No Dam Stars”. It was during my first visit to the lounge when I realized that I had No Dam Stars, because some of the other suite guests were wearing their pins and medals and were actively engaged in what turned out to be a thirty-day competitive “I Can Out Dam You” conversation. The Neptune Lounge was a lovely, convenient amenity and the front desk crew members who staffed it were superlative.

On a daily basis the captain got on the PA (and with a sole exception), he referred to the ship as the "Elegant Statendam." In all honesty, that is a bit of a stretch. Without question, the ship is immaculately clean, but it is worn and tired. The best description I heard was from a passenger who had earned a lot of Dam Stars was that the ship masquerades as "Mutton dressed up as Lamb." Putting a positive spin on it, the Statendam could be charitably described as “shabby chic” or “gently used.” One couldn’t help but notice the frayed carpet or the holes in the 8th deck Ocean Club lampshades, along with many other signs of wear in public venues, as well as in our cabin.

Like I said, “elegant” cruising was a new experience for me; so I had no idea that the problems on the Statendam were not cruise customary. A few examples: Read more