I enjoyed our cruise but I doubt if I'd sail the Conquest again unless they had a different CD and different entertainment. The shows in the theatre were canceled twice due to sound issues, the cd (Paul) was BORING and so was his assistant Squishy. Paul hosted the newlywed game and it was so boring that I actually quit watching it. Paul lost his place several times, would forget who he was talking too, he'd repeat himself and he does the 'ahhhh, errrrr & ummm' thing too many times while he's talking and his accent is hard to understand. The ship is beautiful, the ceilings are even painted. We really enjoyed the food in the MDR Renoir (anytime dining)I mean it was REALLY good, the staff were friendly and the dining room was super clean, we enjoyed the dancing & singing waiters as well. On elegant night my husband wore brown dressy slacks, long sleeved button down shirt and I wore a black skirt & dressy top, several men wore polo style shirts with either dressy slacks or docker type pants, lots of ladies and girls in sun dresses or dressy skirt/top or pants & tops. I didn't see shorts or jeans. On 'lobster' night our waiter brought my husband 2 because he(the waiter) said he thought the lobsters were small. After he finished the 2nd lobster our waiter asked if he wanted a third. He ended up bring everyone who ordered lobster 2 (even the kids) we had 14 of us for anytime dining and at 6:15 we were able to be seated at 2 tables next to each other. No one complained about the food except for the anchovies in the Caesar salad. We had chilled strawberry soup, minestrone soup, salads, prime rib, tiger shrimp with chili sauce which was DELICIOUS, the stuffed poblano pepper (huge), grilled chicken & veggies, pasta, flatiron steak...quite a few different meals and everything was delicious. My one complaint was that my grilled veggies were cold, not room temp; but refrig. cold. We had chicken nuggets, burgers & hot dogs by the pool on the lido deck and they were good, the buffet was good, I ate salad every day after we'd come back from our excursions. I had a grilled cheese sandwich from room service and it was really good. I honestly don't know how anyone can complain about the food. I'm not a gourmet 'foodie' but I know when something tastes good and when it doesn't.
2 of the comedy shows were really funny the others not so much. We were all crammed into the HOT Degas Lounge while the Toulouse Lautrec was used for Bingo games and it was almost always empty. The band in the casino sang the same 20 or so songs every night. Nothing different, same set, same time, same songs. The singers in the lobby were great; but once again they sang the same songs every night. How many times can you hear the song "Hello'?
My husband & MIL had fun doing trivia, we lounged by the water slide on the upper lido deck which was packed and yes there were a few chair hogs but not that many. We watched the mixology contest and the hairy chest contest which IMO should be based on actual hair on the chest not how entertaining the guy was.
The ship was full of LOUD kids & teens roaming the halls every night. It got so bad with the boys following the daughters of 2 of our friends that security had to be called. The boy kept touching the girls, he would give 'playful punches' but he actually put bruises on her. When the boy showed up at their room after following the girls to the 7th deck her dad told him to "get stepping" then he actually went back and waited for the girls to come out again. That's when the other dad got involved and then they called security who came right away and took the boy to his parents. These girls were both 13 and the boy was 14 or 15. He was out and about the next day; but did stay away from the girls.
The kids would bang on the doors and walls, steal the breakfast orders off the doors, take the 'snoozin' signs, they pressed every button in ALL of the elevators at the same time off and on all day and night. When we complained we were told "there's nothing we can do about it"
Our first port was Jamaica; my husband and son did the Bobsled & Dunn's River Falls and they LOVED it! One group of friends did the Rum Tour and she said the bus ride was so fast and rough on non paved roads that it was like a roller coaster. She said they actually had people who got sick on the ride there.
We didn't have a planned excursion so we waited a little while to get off the ship, we get off and went into a building where there were lines of people waiting to get on the shuttles. There was a free shuttle and the pay $15 for all day on the Carnival shuttle. The entire place was chaos; the workers were 'pushy' in reference to taking the free shuttle to the terminal building and then the taxi drives would bring you where you needed to go.
The main problem was that it was a major holiday in Jamaica (Ash Wednesday) and most people tok the day off. The workers told us they didn't have enough drivers for the shuttles so they had 2 making the 45 minute round trip for Carnival. So after waiting over 2 1/2 hours for the shuttle we realizing that we had to be back by 3pm and it was already 12:30 we just went back on the ship. I know that wasn't the fault of Carnival; but they should let passengers know when a country is celebrating a major holiday and will be short staffed in port.
In the Grand Caymans we had to tender and due to several autoimmune diseases I have very limited walking abilities so I use a scooter when we go on vacations. I asked guest services if I could take the scooter onto the tender. They said yes as long as it could be put on and off the tender easily; so I then go to the excursion desk and ask if i could bring my scooter on the Turtle farm, Hell, Stingray excursion and I was told yes that I would have access to a bus with handicap capabilities. So when we go down to the tender there was a man in a white uniform who said "no no no no wheelchairs or scooters" so another man in a white uniform said "yes scooters can go" they argue back and forth and finally another man waves me forward and says "can you get on the tender by yourself?" so I say yes and he asks if my scooter can come apart so I say yes and he says "get on" & my husband had to take it apart by himself and place it on the tender by himself. When we get to the pier the tender drivers helped him to unload it and when we go to catch the bus, the tour lady says that Carnival didn't tell her that I was in a scooter. She said they are 'required' to tell all tour operators when they have a wheelchair or scooter. So naturally they didn't have a bus that could accommodate us; but they put us on an 18 passenger bus/van and my husband just kept taking the scooter apart every time.
I thoroughly enjoyed the Caymans, the island is beautiful, clean and pretty. Our tour guide was Howard and was very knowledgeable. Our trip to 'Hell' was ok, the store is small but they "Devil" is very friendly and so were the store workers. The Stingrays were great. I didn't get in the water but I enjoyed watching my husband and son kiss the stingrays. The water was clean, clear and just beautiful.
We've been to Cozumel several times and didn't do any excursions there; we shopped a bit, went to Pancho's Patio or something like that (??) I don't remember the name; but the margaritas were good and so was our meal. We ended up at The 3 Amigos and then bought a few bottles of tequila on the way back to the ship. They didn't even take it from us; we were just waved on through and we brought it back to our room.
I told my husband I'll never sail during Mardi Gras break when it falls during Presidents week. Way toooooo many kids. I'll try Carnival again; but like I said probably not on the Conquest unless they make some changes.
I have pictures and will eventually put some on the CC boards. I hope my review helped. Oh and we had a balcony room on the 6th floor. Room 6414 and our room steward Samuel (pronounced Sam U L) was AWESOME. Our room was clean, he did towel animals,(a pig, stingray, rabbit & frog) he kept our ice bucket filled and I had a small 6"X6" insulated bag that he kept full of ice too. We had brought a 12 pack of coke on board and Samuel opened the mini bar and told us to put our cans in there.
There were pros & cons to this cruise; but overall we enjoyed being with our friends and family and had a great time.