Norwegian Epic Cruise Review by bear179: Disappointed- don't do it
Overall Member Rating
Disappointed- don't do it
Destination: Western Caribbean
Save your money and go on a different cruise line or and entirely different vacation. There are many good reviews on here and some that are brutally honest. What really separates the two is how much they spent. If you want to enjoy yourself on the Epic, prepare to spend even more money.
When I first booked our room we got it at what I thought was a reasonable price. TWO days later it dropped about 150 dollars. NCL claims to have a price guarantee up to 3 days. I submitted my form to ask for a credit.....never heard back. Great customer service... I should have known then what was coming.
Boarding was easy and didn't take very long. (How could it, you just walk into the casino and are pushed along like cattle). Our steward was nice enough and was great at keeping the room clean.
Activities on board are lacking. The first night we went to who wants to be a bazillionaire (the name should have give it away). It was so boring. They call up three random constants, More pretend to quiz you with really stupid questions, but still give you the answers. It felt like the host was just going through the motions to get it over with. After 10 minutes the audience felt the same way.
The following night we went to Blue Man Group. We booked it ahead of time and arrived early to get good seats. It was kinda funny, nothing amazing, but really compared to rest of the trip I guess you could call it a highlight.
The pool situation was ridiculous. Two tiny pools, over 4000 people on board. People were packed in there like sardines and the little bit of water that I could see was murky. There were a few hot tubs but those too were filled. If you wanted to find a pool chair, you had to get there early. People were throwing their things on the chairs to save them. I showed up at 10am (I'm on vacation, I'm gonna sleep in!) and couldn't find a single chair. I happened upon a closed off section for members (who pay extra) by mistake when someone held the door for me. Barely anyone there (shows that extra $$$ is the only way to have a good experience)
For the rest of trip we mostly stayed in our cabin or in the port. Everything had an extra charge. Wanna bowl, do the rock wall, watch a show that isn't fully booked, play pool, do a workout class? PAY! Want a bucket of domestic beer? $31! Want a piña colada that taste like drano? $8+automatic tip! We went to Taste one night, seating didn't take too long but everyone was in a line that was just being herded to their seats. It took forever to get our app and entree. They were also very small portions. We skipped the dessert because we didn't know how long that would take. After that we spent most nights going to the buffet, which we ended up nicknaming the trough. Greedy and pushy people fighting over crap food that has been siting under a heating lamp for 20 minutes. We actually saw people fighting over an omelette. Sometimes seating was hard to find and finding clean silverware was harder. Room service wasn't any better. You get a choice of sandwiches, a burger, a fruit plate, a salad, soup and some brownies. Room service took FOREVER and when we did eventually get it, it was always cold. (Except for at breakfast when we were delivered warm yogurt and milk). The room service food was awful. The food at O Sheehan's was the worst. We ordered hot chicken wings. Four tiny little wings showed up covered in what I think was ketchup and hot sauce. The fish and chips......the fish didn't flake. You make your own conclusions on that.
The service was hit or miss. Some of the crew were very nice, some were pushy, some were rude, and some were way too fake. I could go on but I feel like this ship has taken enough of our time and $$. Save yourself, don't book a cruise on this ship, or NCL for that matter. Less
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Cabin review: 8181
The room was alright. It had plenty of room for two people that are comfortable with each other. I say that because the bathroom is right next your the couch. The balcony is pretty big, and overall I have no complaints about the room, except maybe that the life boats obstruct your view of the ocean a bit.
Port and Shore Excursions
Skip this if you can. There is a small little secluded and mall like complex full of drunk Walmart people. Right outside the port it looks like a deserted war zone. Empty buildings, deteriorating roads and buildings. Walk a little bit (to the end of the paved road) and find taxis that are cheaper. $2 to take you "downtown". It is a strip of restaurants in front of the beach. They hustle you as soon as you get there and everyone is competing to get you to stay at their beach. Prices are not very good. $6 for a drink, $4 for a beer. I am in Mexico! Why am I paying like I'm in Miami?! Also bring cash with you. An ATM is hard to find.
The best port on our cruise. Cozumel is more established than the other two ports. We docked by Punta Langosta. There is a mall there with many shops that you can feel safe shopping at. There's even a Starbucks there. Just outside the mall you can walk to dozens more local shop and restaurants. We left that area and headed to a beach club about 10 miles away. $50 all you can eat drink snorkel kayak. It was pretty decent. The drinks were weak but the beer was from the bottle. The food was pretty bad but considering we were there all day it wasn't a terrible deal.
As soon as you arrive you are bombarded by dozens of people trying to sell you something or get you in their card. The beach wasn't too packed, but the water had some weird oily film on it. It might have been from the freighter near by, but for my health....I hope not. The prices for beer and food though weren't bad and the people we did talk to were very friendly.
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