Norwegian Epic Cruise Review by Maljvinka: Ugly ship, terrible service, the worst
Overall Member Rating
Ugly ship, terrible service, the worst
Destination: Eastern Caribbean
DON"T GO THERE IF YOU EVER BEEN TO OTHER CRUISE LINE YOU WILL BE GRAVELY DISAPPOINTED!
1. Design. This ship isn't just ugly from outside, it's ugly shroughout. This ship public areas are ugly and cheap nothing like other cruise lines, expect it to look like a ferry or motel 7 on a boat. Design reminiscent of 70th materials, super super cheap, there is no grand staircase, there is no pretty area on the whole ship except one lounge. Cheap furniture, cheap plastic lounges on a pool deck, tiny pool, and people wondering around and thinking what they payed for. Oh, and you can touch the ceiling with your hand in the majority of public area, forget about corridors, it is less then 7 feet. I saw tall gentleman banging his head on the ceiling on 6th floor near casino.
2. Service. The only friendly person on the ship was lady in the buffet who spraying your hands with alcohol and were telling washi washi, smily smily, that is it.The crew on this ship is the worst I have ever More met in any hotel or cruise or any other entertainment industry for that matter. Moody, not friendly, not smiling and serious lack of service. The worst cabin stewardess. first night she was cleaning I left some clothes on a couch, she just threw everything together with shoes into the bottom of the closet, including my white just ironed skirt. Do not expect any other perks you routinely get on other cruise ships as towel sculpture or anything else. The service in the restaurants is non existent as well as any decor or ambiance. As there is no maitre D, I only saw once somebody going around asking how was the dinner, but didn't get to talk as neighbor tables were complaining to him I think that time older lady complained that she had a Birthday and was given no attention:). Expect a line and disorganization or, and it's normal to wait for your dish 40 min. We went to Manhatten(main dining room) twice, when we came it was 6:30 when we left around 9, and not because we were talking, but waiting for our order.They just don't care at all. One night I chose salmon, which came out completely raw, the other night it was steak and lobster, my steak came bloody :) even though I asked medium well, i politely asked to change, I think the waiter stick my dish into the microwave because the steak came back overly done and cut in half and lobster turned into mashed mush :) I mean it is actually funny if we wouldn't pay for this cruise.
3. Entertainment. Whoever rated this ship as a great entertainment really have no idea what to compare to. Yes, they have Blue-man group, the only other show is Las Vegas (which was only three impersonators, singing 3-4 songs each, Katty Perry, Elvis Presley and Steve Tyler ) the rest of the nights these shows were recycled. Do not expect something new every night, do not expect comedy club (they had boring Improve which was recycled every night as well!), do not expect ice carving on a pool deck or parades or other endless entertainment that was on Royal Caribbean or Carnival. Last night we went on the pool deck and met other couples wondering around and asking why nothing is happening, there was absolutely nothing going on. I spent more time in the library doing puzzles all the other cruises together because it was sooo boring. All other shows you have to pay for. (Mystery lunch - don't go, you will see the same boring Improve group)$20/person, Circus dinner is $30 or $40/person and Ice bar which you also have to pay to get in. Bowling you have to pay for as well.
4. Spa (I enjoyed access on for example Royal Caribbean to whirlpool and sauna inside the spa for FREE!!!), here you have to pay $160 to get in! You know like on other cruise ship alcohol you purchased in the ports of call is delivered the last night to your room? Here do not expect this, we forgot about it and spend 40 min in the morning chasing after it.
5. Casino. It looks like casino was an afterthought, it was stuck in the middle of 6 deck with people having to pass through all the time and the casino is ugliest casino you will ever see. I play blackjack and first 3 night they only had $10 tables minimum(which they lowered one table after they saw that not a lot of people are playing), while on other cruises you can find 5 and 3 dollar table as a norm.
6. Pool deck area, please google and see pictures, it is ugly and looks like Staten Island Ferry in NY (or any other ferry), it doesn't look like you came to expect on a cruise boat, whoever did the design for this ship needs to change the carrier. When we were driving back from Miami, I googled this ship again, I put Norwegian Epic ugly ship and I found that it won the ugliest ship in the world. Check it out. Less
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The cabin is the only decent thing on this cruise, I liked the layout and a lot of storage. It's ok for the married couple, although can be uncomfortable for friends. You can literally see and hear everything going on in the toilet and shower as they separated just with frosted glass and right next to the bed, (because of the curved design some beds are by the window, some by the entrance. But I honestly don't know how you can fit kids or third person in the room, even balcony as the other sleeping place would be the couch and it has curved design so in the middle there is little room.
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WHAT WERE WE THINKING?