The Clampett's Go To Sea After years of talking about a "Family Cruise" my wife Gay and I finally laid down the law to the rest of the family last Thanksgiving: No one was allowed to leave the table until we all agreed on a date for a family cruise. So after turkey, stuffing, potato, squash, green bean casserole, soy (for the family vegan) and two hours of lively discussion, everyone committed to 7/28 to 8/1 on the Inspiration. We dubbed the cruise "The Clampett's Go To Sea", as there are some in our family of 12 that think Johnny Cash is another name for a pay toilet. But I'm not going to be naming names here.

Flight: JetBlue nonstop from Boston to Tampa and thank you for the frequent flier miles. Had us in at 10:30 AM. Took a Tampa Bay Shuttle from the airport to the Port of Tampa and were at the big white dreamboat with the red and blue whaletail funnel at 11:15. 9 of the family members had never cruised before (heck, most of them have never been out of town before). Gay and I had to walk around behind them and pull the little string in the back of their head to close their gaping jaws when they first saw the ship. I honestly believe that they would have stood at the port staring at the ship in wonder right up until 4:00 and watched it sail away. Like I almost did on my first cruise.

I explained to them about tipping the baggage handlers at the port. After seeing all the baggage moved and the dollar bills change hands, 8 members of the family were willing to forego the cruise in order to hang around the port and "chuck bags for a buck." Read more