Gays and lesbians with a love of the open sea have a bewildering number of cruising choices to accompany the diversity of their communities and interests. For those more interested in nonstop partying, intense bonding and gay-friendly ports of call, companies such as Atlantis, R.S.V.P., Olivia and Pied Piper Travel frequently charter ships from the major cruise lines to offer all-gay cruises. A major attraction of these types of "positively pink" adventures is, of course, the joyful freedom to be totally open about one's affections for a same-sex partner (no awkward conversations of the "he's not just my roommate" variety).
On the other hand, those who don't want to compromise on luxury or variety of itineraries (or be "ghetto-ized" on all-gay ships) can choose from any sailing today and feel welcomed both by fellow passengers and the cruise staff and management. In fact, in the past few decades, all cruise lines have come to recognize the power of the almighty gay cruising dollar and court this valuable segment through marketing campaigns, onboard amenities and special programs, such as the very popular "Friends of Dorothy" (FOD) meet-and-greets, listed in the ship's daily programs. The inaugural cruise by Rosie O'Donnell's R Family Vacations sailed in July 2004. Targeted squarely at gays and lesbians with children, it's another trend in the diverse and changing gay cruising market.
Of course, the most powerful weapon cruise lines have to attract gay passengers is simply positive word-of-mouth, as past passengers spread the word quickly about which lines are the most gay-friendly, have the most comfortable staff and crew and offer more unique experiences. Gays and lesbians researching future cruises should definitely rely on our firsthand experience, and pay close attention to ports of call. For instance, in 2004, protestors met a cruise ship, chartered by R Family Vacations, when it docked in the Bahamas, and the company chose to cancel a 2007 stop in Bermuda when church groups on that island threatened to do the same. There have been similar reports of unfriendly attitudes toward gays on other Caribbean islands, such as Jamaica, and in conservative countries like Turkey, though these are very small blips on the generally clear gay cruising radar.
Balancing the expectations and interests of cruise lines' majority-straight and minority-gay passengers can be a challenge. The lines that are most successful at attracting gay passengers know that a small portion of their heterosexual guests may feel uncomfortable with outward displays of gay affection and that some of their more low-key gay guests may want to remain in the closet during the voyage. In many cases, cruise lines may know they attract many gay passengers but don't have hard statistics, simply because they don't assume anything about two men (or women) staying in the same cabin.
Besides rare -- but highly publicized -- incidents, involving altercations between straight and gay passengers, gays and straights seem to get along 99 percent of the time. Maybe it's the Caribbean (or Mediterranean) sun, warming up the friendly vibe onboard. Or, perhaps, it's the "camp" factor -- which can be high when groups of gays congregate together, loosening up the more straight-laced heterosexual passengers -- but most gays and lesbians report nothing but positive experiences onboard mainstream cruise ships. (Some even say that the "heteros" they met onboard became fast friends!)
So given the almost limitless cruising choices these days, in which direction should Mr. and Mr. (or Ms. and Ms.) Traveler, in search of a mainstream cruise experience, point the cruise compass?
Regent Seven Seas: This ultra-premium cruise line offers the same type of luxury experience offered by Crystal, Seabourn, Silversea and others in its category, but it has a more laid-back attitude. Of course, given the high price tag of Regent cruises, there's a high proportion of older, retired folks onboard Regent's four ships, but gays are made to feel welcome. Gay-friendly cruise directors like the fabulous Barry Hopkins make us all feel at home with "FOD" meetings and a welcoming vibe. Open seating means you can choose your dining companions, and the crew hardly bats an eye when asked for a king-size bed (instead of doubles) for two men. Gays and lesbians love 10-day or longer Mediterranean cruises and also seem to enjoy exotic South America itineraries. Those in the mood for magical, South Pacific breezes flock to the Paul Gauguin, the gold cruise standard in ultra-gay-friendly French Polynesia.
Crystal Cruises: This ultra-premium big-ship cruise line boasts many loyal gay guests, who return to its two ships for the cocooning luxury and impeccable gay-friendly service. While onboard, many gay passengers enjoy the FOD meetings, private events (galley tours, officers' receptions, etc.) or even check out the gay-themed movies in the ship's library, from "Philadelphia" and "Jeffrey" to bluer fare. Crystal tends to attract a wealthier, more conservative (some would call them "stuffy"), CEO- or Republican-type of clientele, but sophisticated gay passengers mix and mingle freely, enjoying the acclaimed gourmet cuisine and the best singers and dancers onboard any ship -- some directly from Broadway. Crystal is the perfect choice for the older gay couple, more settled single, or discreet group that wants to experience what true pampering at sea can be.
Princess: "There's a reason it's called Princess," reports one loyal fan of the popular cruise line. With the ultra-flexible Personal Choice dining program (in addition to traditional, fixed seating), a gay-friendly crew and staff, and large ships, Princess includes just about every feature gays are looking for. Besides high-tech Internet cafes and expansive showrooms, many Princess ships boast pulsating dance floors and clubs that would make West Hollywood or Chelsea natives feel right at home.
Celebrity: This upscale cruise line gets generally high marks for its treatment of gay and lesbian passengers. Many gays love the mix of passengers onboard, and luxury-seekers book Celebrity's Concierge-Class suites with their menu of pillow choices, duvets, Frette bathrobes and other amenities. Celebrity Xpedition, a small vessel with only 100 passengers, plies the rich waters and islands of the Galapagos Islands and has created a buzz among adventure-seeking gays.
Holland America: This classy line is set apart from other lines by its strong emphasis on high-quality and diverse cuisine, which certainly appeals to gay gourmands. As with Celebrity, many gay and lesbian cruisers, who don't want to spend a small fortune for a long cruise, opt for Holland America and its elegant ships, which feature impressive onboard spaciousness and a higher big-ship staff-to-guest ratio. Particularly popular are the sparkling Vista- and Signature-Class ships (Westerdam, Zuiderdam, Noordam, Oosterdam and Eurodam), with the line's highest percentage of staterooms with private verandahs. Some gay guests report that the "heteros and homos" really let their hair down in the ship's casino, wagering and bonding -- a common occurrence on almost every ship today. The friendliness of the Holland America staff is evident everywhere onboard; one gay couple said that, when they danced together on a Holland America cruise, no one seemed to notice (or care).
Norwegian Cruise Line: The cruise line that started an industry trend with its "Freestyle Cruising" (no set dinner times, open seating, relaxed dress codes, etc.) appeals to a broad range of gays and lesbians. The line offers great value for money, and the staff is generally attuned to gay interests (no problem with FOD meetings on most ships, and some report many large gay groups who are sailing with various parents, siblings and friends). The line has close ties with R Family Vacations. Norwegian reaches almost every popular cruising destination around the world, and those from the Northeast love the year-round sailings out of New York City.
Cunard: Gays and lesbians aren't exempt in wanting the "bragging rights" of having sailed aboard the "longest, tallest and grandest ocean liner ever." One bar on the QM2, the Commodore Lounge, has already been given the nickname of "Commodorothy" because of the high concentration of gays who liven it up each evening. Assigned seating in one of the main restaurants is in tune with the formality of the old-world, grand experience, yet many of QM2's features, such as the fabulous Canyon Ranch Spa and huge separate weight room, are very modern.
Seabourn Cruise Line: With only three ships of 200 guests each, the luxury yachts of Seabourn are, well, like intimate yachts, plying unique, colorful harbors around the world. The upscale passengers onboard Seabourn are a sophisticated group overall, and the small-ship size means that just about everyone is included in onboard activities and games. The well-trained staff goes out of its way to make each guest feel welcome in this very sociable (as well as pampering) atmosphere. Besides appealing to the inner sybarite in all of us, the Yachts of Seabourn attract experienced, slightly older gay and lesbian cruisers, who've already done the big ships; they want to visit lesser-known destinations that can be accessed through the complimentary "Exclusively Seabourn Shore Excursions." Cruise regions in the Mediterranean and Northern Europe are especially popular.
Royal Caribbean: Partly by sheer dint of having the largest fleet of cruise ships anywhere (21 at last count), any Royal Caribbean cruise will include many Friends of Dorothy. Gay and lesbian "size queens" favor the glamorous, 3,000-plus passenger Voyager- and Freedom-Classes of ships, which include the largest cruise ships in the world. The big appeal? Active folks love the rock-climbing walls, ice-skating rinks and in-line skating tracks offered on these vessels and have their choices of destinations in America, Europe, Alaska, South America and, of course, the Caribbean.
Windstar: The three Windstar ships (more accurately, small motor-sail-yachts) are renowned for bringing back the meaning of the word "sailing." Despite the ships' small sizes -- 148 passengers on Wind Star and Wind Spirit and 308 on Wind Surf -- the total experience is luxurious and classy with fantastic gourmet cuisine, spas and fitness centers, and most other amenities of larger ships. Key attractions of Windstar are its very active itineraries in the Caribbean and Europe, where passengers can make use of free water sports -- like water skiing or snorkeling -- launched from the backs of the ships. Windstar's staff is very gay-friendly, and fellow passengers tend to be younger and more liberal. Windstar's unique combination of small-ship intimacy and relaxed, casual vibe makes it a favorite among the younger, more active set.
We must add this "honorable mention" category: Almost every major cruise line has some gay following, and many -- which we did not have room to mention here -- do go out of their way to appeal to the lucrative gay market. Carnival Cruise Lines is popular among gays for its reasonable prices, wide variety of itineraries and younger, "hipper" crowds, which are often ready to party and socialize. And gay passengers enjoy SeaDream Yacht Club's luxury ships -- awarded an "Utterly Exclusive" ranking by Berlitz (higher than luxury lines like Crystal or Regent) -- for their casual dress, active itineraries and gay-friendly staffs.
As for the other side of the coin, cruise lines that aren't known for being particularly gay-friendly include Disney Cruise Line, which ranks low on gay lists for its obvious traditional-families-with-kids spirit (not that gays and lesbians don't have kids -- ask Rosie O'Donnell and R Family Vacations). Gays are also scarce onboard most of the smaller river-oriented cruise lines in the U.S., which cater to a predominantly Midwestern, traditional set. Likewise, European river cruise lines, such as Viking or Uniworld, don't actively court gay travelers, but then again, this is more in line with the "live and let live," low-key European tradition.
Don't forget that, even if a cruise line or ship doesn't have the reputation of being gay-friendly, a vivacious, partying and fun group (I'm talking about you and your closest gay friends, of course) can do wonders to change that image. So, don't be reluctant to book any cruise that strikes your fancy!
--by Stan Wu. In addition to writing about cruising trends in the burgeoning gay and lesbian market for Cruise Critic, Los Angeles-based Stan Wu is also the travel editor of westhollywood.com and Metrosource Magazine.
Gays and lesbians with a love of the open sea have a bewildering number of cruising choices to accompany the diversity of their communities and interests. For those more interested in nonstop partying, intense bonding and gay-friendly ports of call, companies such as 
Besides rare -- but highly publicized -- incidents, involving altercations between straight and gay passengers, gays and straights seem to get along 99 percent of the time. Maybe it's the Caribbean (or 
